I recently turned, hold on, I need to pause for effect, THIRTY (gasp). How? When? Wow. First, let me start by saying how insanely grateful I am to have even made it to age 30. That in and of itself is a HUGE blessing. BUT, it does feel like I just graduated from high school. I would roll my eyes when those with more life experience would comment about this. All I could think about was the next fun thing on my agenda. Now, twelve years later, I can concur that those with life experience were absolutely right- time flies.
Now that I too have little bit of experience under my belt, I thought I would share a few of the most impressionable lessons I’ve learned over the years. I have tons of experience because I’ve always learned via my many, many mistakes, ha.
1) You will never please everyone. Stop trying to.
2) Time is the most valuable thing you have. Stop wasting it. Enjoy your life. Go live it without fear or overthinking.
3) You are going to make mistakes. If you’re like me, you’ll make a lot of them. Be patient with yourself, but make sure you learn from them.
4) The two most important relationship you have are the one you have with yourself and the one you have with God/the universe/higher power (insert your preference).
5) No one else is responsible for your happiness. If you constantly seek happiness outside of yourself, you will always be disappointed.
6) Your partner cannot fix you or make you love yourself. If you do not love yourself whole heartedly, do not get into a relationship. You have to be happy within yourself before you ever will be with another human being.
7) Make spending time with your family and loved ones a priority if you have a good relationship with them. Most of the people in your life will come and go throughout different seasons, but the people who raised you, the ones you’ve always been able to depend on, the ones who love you unconditionally, make time for them. Life is so short and you never know when how long you have with them. Time spent with loved ones is so precious and is something you can never get back. The nights out, parties, next exciting thing, will always be there. Your Grandmother will not be.
8) Death is a part of living, but coping with it is unexplainable painful and something I don’t think you fully ever get over. You just learn to live without them.
9) Do not be afraid to ask for help. It shows strength to admit you need it, not weakness.
10) If you don’t take care of yourself, everything else in your life will feel out of alignment. You cannot pour from an empty cup.
11) Closed mouths don’t get fed, aka you have to ask for what you want and need. This goes for relationships and in your career. Most people can’t read minds.
12) No one owes you anything. Everything you get in life must be earned in one form or another.
13) Everything my dad told me that I rolled my eyes at 15 years ago is true. Listen to the people who have more life experience that you and stop thinking you know everything.
14) Your education is so much more important that temporary pleasures and distractions.
15) Your worth is not dependent on anyone else’s opinion or approval of you.
16) Experiences that feel scary to you (in a good way) and push you our of your comfort zone will almost always help you grow. Be open to them.
17) YOU TEACH PEOPLE HOW TO TREAT YOU. Period. If someone mistreats you and you do not immediately correct them and set a boundary, you are allowing it. Do not play the victim. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries.
18) Do your best to never pass judgement on anyone regardless of what they are doing. You are not God and you have no idea what that person may be dealing with or battling. Leave the judging to the Lord himself and pray for them instead of talking badly about them.
19) Do more of the things that set your soul on fire. Do not be afraid to live.
20) Stop trying to be perfect. You’re not and you never will be. It’s called being human. You cannot control everything, and perfection is unattainable.
21) You are allowed to have bad days and let yourself rest. Being busy is not the same thing as being productive. Sometimes it is okay just to be and exist without trying to mark something off your to-do list. Just don’t allow yourself to get stuck there. The only way to get over the bad days is to keep moving forward.
22) What’s meant for you will not miss you. Do not force anything. Let it flow.
23) Money and material objects can only buy you temporary happiness. Travel and experiences are a better investment.
24) LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION.
25) Choosing to remain positive in a temporary negative environment or situation is not ignorance, it’s leadership.
26) Learn to practice gratitude every single day. This is the single biggest thing that changed my perspective and outlook on life. We have so much to be thankful for that we often take it for granted. This is life changing. Write thank you cards, start a gratitude journal, etc.
27) Be intentional with your time. If not, you’ll end up spending two hours scrolling on TikTok and wondering what happened to your day.
28) Never stop learning. There are so many avenues to continue learning now that there is literally no excuse. Podcasts, YouTube, books. You have every piece of information at your fingertips.
29) Running from or distracting yourself from your feeling and emotions will not fix or heal them. It will cause them to come out in very ugly ways and hurt other people. Take time to heal your wounds so you don’t pass them along to those undeserving of the pain.
30) Life has many ebbs and flows be it in your career, relationships, or something else. Some days you will love where you are and other days you will date it. This is normal and part of the human experience.
So, here’s to thirty years and all the valuable lessons learned. I am actually really looking forward to my thirties. After all, thirty is the new twenty, right? That’s what I am going to keep telling myself!
XOXO, Sarah